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WE BUY NICE HOMES ! 330-961-1901

The Mysterious Handwritten "Note", Translated!

If you are interested in selling a house QUICKLY and EASILY, without the usual time, hassle and expense of real estate agents and closing costs, keep reading.


Our methods of buying and selling houses have helped thousands upon thousands of sellers all across the USA. If you continue your research online, you will find that this type of letter has been the most effective industry-standard direct mail marketing piece for about 15 years. Because of this we generally mail several hundred per week in Stark, Summit, Medina and Portage counties of northeast Ohio, where we buy houses!


Please see this page for more information, or... you could always just call the phone number on the letter. :-)


If you ARE NOT interested in selling a house, please be grateful that you have a trash receptacle near your mailbox. Better yet, please do someone a favor and pass the letter along! If they are interested in selling a house, THEY will be grateful.

Congratulations! If you have received a letter in the mail like the one shown at left and are scouring the web looking for answers, this page is for you. While there is some very amusing speculation to be found on the internet, here are the simple facts.


You have received this letter because:


"Hi,"

This means "Hi", synonymous with "Hello", or "Greetings".


"My name is James."

This means that my name is James. No, my office staff will not give you my last name. I have enough stalkers. I really prefer that you resist the temptation to park outside my house in the wee-morning hours with binoculars, at least until we get to know each other a little better. And please refrain from impersonating law enforcement officers or vulgar professional wrestlers on the telephone. It's probably illegal and, well, a bit ridiculous. Besides, your call may be recorded for training purposes. Feel free, I guess, to drive in circles around our parking lot. It's a little weird... but we do find it kind of amusing!


"I want to BUY your house at:

{address}"

This means that I am interested in buying your house at this address. Wanna sell it? Read on!


"Please call me at

330-961-5554"

This means, if you are interested in selling this house or another one, please call 330-961-5554. If you stop by the office unannounced, you will be given the opportunity to make an appointment for a consultation. If no one is there at the office, you can always leave us a note with your phone number. OR... you could just call the number on your letter!


"Thanks,


James"

Translation: Thanks. James. Because my name is James. Thank you for reading, and have an amazing day!

Now that you've done your research, you know what to do if you'd like to sell your house. I look forward to speaking with you!